So this past month has been life changing for me. I mean that not in a ‘I’m heading off in a whole new direction in search of new horizons’ kind of way, but in a way that has opened my eyes to why I need to do the things that I used to just accept as a given. I’ve never questioned the amount of time I spend in ministry. I’ve always seen it as an extension of this life I have chosen to live, of this Jesus I’ve decided to follow. He set the examples, I follow. While that in itself isn’t the worst life to lead, coming to this realisation today of how amazing it really is to live a life led by God is the biggest affirmation of why I really do what i do.
It hasn’t been easy, not by any means. I’m physically exhausted, mentally drained, and emotionally in tatters. But strange as it sounds, in the most fulfilling way possible. I sit here writing this at almost 1am having had an hour long conversation with a friend; this was a conversation I’ve wanted to have for a while now. I’d been afraid how it would turn out, how he would react, I’d worried about saying the wrong things. Having decided against this fear, I sit here in a whole new light of how God is truly with us everywhere we care to find Him, anywhere we decide for Him against all else.
People question me. People tell me I have more important things to attend to. People tell me I need to rethink my priorities. Well, I tell people, it’s worth it.
Romans 8:35-39 (NIV)
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:
“For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.