i wouldnt be surprised if half the reader’s of this blog died of depression

“I can’t keep being your second choice, not when you’re my first.”
— Ephram Brown in Everwood

isnt what we made it out to be. it almost never is what we make it out to be. for me, anyway. but what can i do (:

exams? what exams

time and age
they do not wait
by them we gauge
of that, our fate

it probably isnt an exaggeration to say that ive never cried so hard in my life. ive never felt so cold, ive never felt more alone with so many around me. ive never felt this dead, yet more than alive with all the pain. this is my cry for help, knowing that it’s not gonna change a thing.

Light my fire
Be my light
The need be dire
Deep in the night

“In a controversy, the instant we feel anger, we have already ceased striving for truth and have begun striving for ourselves.”
— Abraham J. Heschel

i’m fighting a losing battle it would seem. but heck there’s so much more to life like new sheets and a new pillow haha. i love my new pillow. its so ungerman. whee.

and there could be so much more (:

it’s been a while, but im back (:

here are the shots that i bothered to go thru from my trip to holland.
visit my flickr for more (:

this past month has been one of them