so i’m off to london tomorrow. i donno why but it seems like i cant wait to get away from germany =s i really should learn to appreciate what have. imma stop whining! haha im already starting to wonder if thats possible. anyway. i haven had many pictures to play with lately but next week should give me plenty haha so hopefully this blog will start being interesting again after that =P
i can’t wait for roast duck! =9
and hey it’s been almost one month (=
because life is not a 2 and half hour long movie.
because life is not a 700 page long novel.
because life is not a 5 minute long song.
because life is not about the what ifs and could have beens.
because life is what you choose it to be.
which is probably a good thing i guess. hehe. i found out today that im not all alone after all =D hahah it’s funny how you go through life not knowing that we might’ve missed sth until it ironically comes back to you and you realise that you missed it the first time and how close you were to totally missing it but now that you know you haven’t missed it it’s totally cool cos you won’t have to live without knowing what you missed or not knowing that you missed anything at all =P hahaha. im feeling spritely. wooots. anyone feel like going out? give me a call pleasee. i feel like i haven been out in ageeessssss. i don know where we could go since its blahdy cold out and there’s prolly nowhere to go anyways but lets jus go out! anyone. duh. i feel like having seafood. like oyster pancakes and sea cucumbers and butter prawns and bbq stingray and fried sotong. oh and im craving for bidin like wtf i haven had bidin in like forever. can i please have some bidin for christmas. christmas! christmas is less than a month away. woohoo. i have such a huge wishlist this year it would be so obscene (and shameless) if i posted it here. but im going to anyway 
okay so for christmas this year, i want a new guitar (im thinking sorta takamina g series or a les paul of some sort-i so wouldnt mind a gibson LOL), a new camera (i feel like ive been pushing my trusty lil a200 to its limits lately-don get me wrong its been such an awesome camera it will always be my first love but oh damn is that 550 sexy. cmon sony we need a replacement for the 700!), one or two new lenses (i like the czeiss 16-80!), a new flashgun (or two or three-the more the merrier), a new pair of shoes (cos i realised all my shoes do a crap job of keeping my feet warm), a new blazer/sportcoat/a whole blahdy suit would be awesome, some new ties, pants! i want pants!, i also want kolo mee, and gubak mee, and laksa (which reminds me i have half a pack of laksa sauce sitting in the fridge), sio bee and tau hu chui, cha kueh, i want a whole set of mathematical instruments and all those other stuff that i need for my technical drawing classes like those fancy curve stencils and what not, a new laptop! (i’ve been thinking for oh so long bout getting a macbook but i have no idea how im gonna come up wit the cash to get one but i really do need a new one mine’s been threatening to go kamikaze on me the past few weeks), return flight tickets for all the people who wanna come visit me (im assuming that there are ppl out there who actually wanna come my visit me-oh cmon humor me my ego needs milking), oh oh i wan to be able to know exactly wad’s going on in every class and to know wad imma need to score for my exams ; ), oh and divine help wit choosing presents for the people who deserve presents because holy moly i have no idea what im gonna get them for christmas =0. oh and i wan a car and a driver’s license so i can drive around europe (make it a nice car please). i also wan all the hungry kids in the world to be fed. i wan all the sick to be healed and all the poor to be provided for. i wan all those who need love to get love. and to those that matter the most to me, i want them all to know how much i really care about them, and how i wish i could spend christmas with all of the ones i cant spend christmas with. oh and i want coke. the drink. woot. OH and i want katy perry for christmas. hehe.
what would you do if you knew you could not fail?
lol this is such a rubbish post. sorry for the lousy read people. wait till i get inspired =D
“Too often, the thing you want most is the one thing you can’t have. Desire leaves us heartbroken, it wears us out. Desire can wreck your life. But as tough as wanting something can be, the people who suffer the most, are those who don’t know what they want.”
after all, who am i to say that i really do deserve to get what i want? i’ve learned in the past one year that life is never gonna be fair when you expect it to be. it’s a question that i’ve asked myself plenty of times; why do things have a way of going wrong at all the wrong times? i realise now that i’ve only bothered to take into account all the times when things went wrong and it sucked for me; i’ve never really given much thought to the times when i’ve had it good or when the things that go wrong are too trivial for me to notice. because the fact of the matter is, we all go through the same things in life. it’s how we approach each new day, each new hurdle, each new joy that ultimately determines what we do with our lives. i whine and bitch all the time about how it sucks that i can’t get what i want and that it’s unfair for me to have to go through all this and oh woe is me. today i had the chance to reflect, and see that hey, it’s not always about me. it’s not always about what i get in return for loving you. i don’t love you because i want you to kiss me goodnight every night and good morning every morning and tell me you love me every other second of the day. i love you because that’s jus the way it is, because you’ve been a big big part of my life for so long and we’ve always been there for each other and that’s not gonna change. today made me realise, that hey, what izzit that i’ve done to make me think that i deserve better? am i so much more qualified than everyone else? because the fact of the matter is, love isn’t something that we do just so we feel better about ourselves. it’s not something that we say just to be glorified by everyone around us. it’s not something that will go away, jus because you don’t tell me that you’ve been thinking bout me for the past 3 hours 11 minutes and 57 seconds. it’s something that will always be a part of both of our lives, not something that we must feed to keep going. it’s not lust, it’s not passion, it’s not temporary, it’s not something that will disappear if you don’t tell me it’s there. it’s not something that will grow 10 times stronger tomorrow just because i told you ten times today that i love you. because it’s never only about me, it’s never only about yourself. love is the fruit of us having been there for each other, for having supported one another, for having gone through highs and lows together, fruit of the times when we always have a place to turn to when we don’t know where else to go, of the moments we spent together believing that nothing will ever go wrong as long as we hang on to each other, knowing that that is bullshit because life is never that simple but knowing at the same time that no matter what we go through and no matter what life throws at us that we will never be alone in walking the long road home. it is the fruit of trust, of faith, of belief; things that we will never be able to simply talk into existence.
life is not always rainbows and tulips and honey pots and beds of roses. it’s doesn’t always shimmer, it doesn’t always shine. there will definitely be times in life, when you come up with emo blog post after emo blog post, not realising that whoever is reading is probably sick to the grave of your emoness. and right now i find myself deep in one of those phases so don’t patronise me for being so philosophically morbid these few months =D
so. at the risk of plunging head first into the irony and hipocrisy of such an act, imma go ahead and tell you how much i love you =D teehehe. hey i’ll say what i want. cos i do love you. and you mean more than all the bowls of kolo mee in the world could ever mean to me. and i miss you like fcuk. and i can’t wait to see you again. whatever makes me happy i sunshine. LOL. ^.^.v..
edit: text me once you read this. so i know you’ve read it ((: oh and say sth nice thatd be awesome =P
“Are we to paint what’s on the face, what’s inside the face, or what’s behind it?”
-Pablo Picasso
so it’s 6:41 am and im up. and im writing. haha. it actually feels good to be up this early for a change. i should make it a habit. humm. wonder how that will work out. it’s been a rollercoaster of a second semester abroad for me so far, and i really do feel the need for some time off. so it’s off to the lake city of Konstanz this weekend, and London and Paris for 9 days starting next weekend. wheee.
have a good day. yeah you (:
“They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.” -Andy Warhol
is it not how we deal wit the negativities in life that defines who we are? how the poor boy from the slums overcomes all adversities to become the richest man on the continent. how the physically handicapped girl defeats her disabilities to realise her dream of becoming a national athlete. how we deal with day to day shortcomings and disappointments, and the numerous low points in our lives, to reach the peaks and to be able to look back and see how far we’ve come. anger, jealousy, disappointment, greed can only defeat those who let themselves be defeated. the moments we enjoy the most in life, are made all the more sweeter when we realise the things we have overcome, and take it all in.
on a lighter and much less emo note, you gotta love this picture =D
..v.^.^
it’s in times like these, that i realise how lucky i actually am, and how i need to learn to stop whining.
because in every season, God is still God.
edit: awesome (:
and on a side note,
..v.^.^.v.. oh ma gaw soo kewtt!!
“Most things aren’t better left unsaid. SAY WHAT YOU FEEL. Anyone that matters won’t mind.”
Today, i learned that everyone needs someone to be there for them. Whether they care to admit it or not. And i hope that me being there for you actually counts for something, i hope it means something, and i sure as hell hope it doesn’t mean nothing. And here i say thank you, to everyone who’s ever been there for me, i am eternally grateful. Hugs all around (=
Talk about cornay!
and just for kicks, a photo of the day (:
another random hdr shot (:
“When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No… don’t blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn’t sound very exciting, does it? But it is!”
-Captain Corelli’s Mandolin
it baffles me, really, the way things change. the way they’re so different now, the way i find that i cannot understand why. all i know how to do now is to have faith. cos i believe you, i believe in you. cos i know one day we’ll look back, and laugh (:
i'm praying for you (:
“and it’s usually not until the thing is taken away from you that you realise how wrong you’ve been, and how much you love it.”
i’m gonna smile, not cos anything’s going particularly well, or because i have a reason to (i have many reasons not to), but simply because i want to, and i will (=
